Sinestezie

A zis bine Mircea Popescu ca “sinestezia e boala blogosferei”, pentru ca am primit de la vave o leapsa. Vreau sa-i multumesc pe aceasta cale, pentru ca m-a facut sa ma descopar si sa ma inteleg mai bine. :D

If I were a month, I would be al treishpelea salariu.
If I were a day of the week, I would be ar fi o sansa din 7 ca azi sa fiu eu. Si 2 sanse din 7 sa fiu mahmur.
If I were a time of day, I would be 00:30, ora pe care o urasc in timpul saptamanii, pentru ca urmeaza o zi de munca si trebuie sa ma culc, respectiv ora la care-s beat muci vineri sau sambata noaptea in club si nu mai am tricoul pe mine.
If I were a sea animal, I would be the Lochness Monster (and I would probably eat dolphins).
If I were a direction, I would probably get people lost.
If I were a virtue, I would be truth. This is a lie.
If I were a historical figure I would be a historical figure that had lots of orgies and screwed citizens. Maybe Tariceanu, Iliescu or Nastase.
If I were a planet, I would be that lame-ass Pluto, which is not a planet anymore and has been demoted to dwarf planet. I mean, wtf is a dwarf planet? And if I were porno, I would be the porno dwarf planet.
If I were a liquid, I would get you wasted 24/7.
If I were a stone, I would hit you in the head, you bloody idiot.
If I were a bird, I would be a dolphin eating pterodactyl.

If I were a flower/plant, I would be a dolphin eating subaquatic carnivorous plant (?! wtf).
If I were a kind of weather, I would be that shitty kind of snowy weather that pisses me off when I go to work and the road is all muddy and shit because the snow melts and every fucking one blogs about how fucking great it is that it’s fucking snowing.
If I were a musical instrument, I would be an armpit that makes fart-like noises.
If I were an emotion, I would be this :| . Exactly.
If I were a sound, I would be *FAAART*.
If I were an element, I would be the 6th element, sex. Or maybe the 7th element, [straight] sodomy.

If I were a song, I would be “Dope – Let’s Fuck” or maybe “Die MF die”.
If I were a movie, I would be “The 8th Element”, orgy.
If I were a tv-series, I would be off the air.
If I were a book, I would stay away from that ignorant reinvented dude.
If I were a fictional character, I would be a guy pretending to reinvent himself.

If I were a food, I would be dolphin. Mmmmm.. dolphin.
If I were a city, I would be Sodom and Gomorrah. OK, they’re 2 cities. So what? You want a piece of me?
If I were a taste, I would be fucking bitter, but addictive.
If I were a scent, I would be *FAAART* whoops, again.
If I were a colour, I would not be some weird color invented by a crazy woman, or probably a homosexual. Hmm, most definitely a homo.
If I were a fabric, I would be shmirghel.

If I were a word, I would be apathetic.
If I were a body part, I would be my penis. Ha! Nu va asteptati la asta, nu?
If I were a facial expression, I would be apathy.
If I were a subject in school, I would be nude Scarlett Johansson body painting for teens that just reached puberty. Oh yeah.
If I were a cartoon character, I would be Peter Griffin.
If I were a shape, I would be the shape of Scarlett Johansson’s boobs.
If I were a number, I would be 34c (Scarlett Johansson’s breast size).
If I were a car, I would be a monster truck.
If I were an item of clothing, I would be a bra or panties. Preferably Scarlett Johansson’s. :P

Dau leapsa mai departe la Cati, Sabina (alooo, trezireaa), Luana, Zuza, Ioana (roz sau nu), Madelaine (poate te mai inveseleste), Moretta, Copilandra, Bau (ati fost cam lenese lately). Hai s-o incerc si pe-asta: i-o dau si Cristinei, sunt curios daca o s-o onoreze in stilul ei mizantropic.

La tipi n-am dat-o, din motive evidente. Dar puteti s-o luati, cu conditia sa nu o luati la modul serios, ca altfel incep sa ma indoiesc de sexualitatea voastra. :P

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39 Comments

  1. Posted March 22, 2009 at 1:25 pm | Permalink

    si cu comentariul meu la articolul ala ce ai avut? la tine sinestezia cuprinde absolut toate simturile? mai ales sentimentele…

    zisesem ca blogul tau are gust de inghetata de valinie cu bucati confiate de pepene galben si kiwi… si ca al meu are gust de apa minerala cu lamaie.

    PS. numele tau il vad galben-portocaliu si pe al meu il vad galben-pai

  2. Posted March 22, 2009 at 1:28 pm | Permalink

    cat despre articol, a fost amuzant si racoritor :P

  3. Posted March 22, 2009 at 1:31 pm | Permalink

    am inteles ca leapsa ai luat-o de la vave, pe care voiai sa o mai inveselesti, dar ai cam intrecut masura cu numarul de delfini mancati pe m2.

  4. Catalin
    Posted March 22, 2009 at 1:33 pm | Permalink

    @Stefania – atuncea iti stergeam toate comentariile. Probabil ai facut tu vreo prostie de ai reusit sa ma enervezi, nu mai tin minte exact ce.

    Cat despre vave, stiu ca are simtul umorului. Deci nu se supara ca mananc delfini. :P

  5. Posted March 22, 2009 at 1:54 pm | Permalink

    You’re damn fucking inlove… sau cel putin asta reiese din articolul asta… problema e, de cine?
    btw, stii cum imi zicea mie Alex? (as in, my first guru): delfin…

  6. Catalin
    Posted March 22, 2009 at 1:56 pm | Permalink

    @Stefania.. I haven’t the slightest idea what are you talking about. Si te mai miri de ce-ti sterg comentarii. :) )
    Erm.. cum sa-i zici cuiva “delfin”? :) )

  7. Posted March 22, 2009 at 1:58 pm | Permalink

    pai… cuiva care e onest, inteligent, liber… si iubeste mediul subacvatic cum sa-i zici? pluto? =))

  8. Posted March 22, 2009 at 2:26 pm | Permalink

    il schimbi tot timpul… viitorul…

    sau il schimba lumea din jur care evolueaza impreuna cu noi? oare noi (si tu, cititorule) suntem predestinati sa transformam lumea, dar sa ramanem singuri??

    nu pot sa ma bazez pe nimic. oftez si o iau de la capat…
    eu nu vreau sa plec cu nu stiu care, ca sa iau lectii de yoga avansat…. eu … eu vreau sa fiu… me.

    me@arsenestefania.com :P
    pentru cine vrea sa ma ajute/finanteze sa-mi deschid o firma de self-help/reiki/yoga/initiere in… orice.

  9. Catalin
    Posted March 22, 2009 at 2:36 pm | Permalink

    @stefania.. chiar ma straduiesc sa gasesc un motiv sa nu-ti sterg comentariile. :P
    Ce-i blogul meu? Rubrica de anunturi?

  10. Posted March 22, 2009 at 2:49 pm | Permalink

    acum ma intreb care din noi e mai penibil…

    m-ai lasat sa umplu rubrica de comentarii de la ultimele 3 articole… ce s-a intamplat cu regula: maxim 2 comentarii pe zi? :P

    de ce nu mai ai decat 13 readeri?

    anyway… pentru mine e cat e cat un progres, pentru ca de data asta nu mai tin un monolog.

  11. Posted March 22, 2009 at 5:09 pm | Permalink

    Am fost cam leneşe, dar am avut motiv? Ştii cât am conspectat în ultima săptămână?

  12. Jo
    Posted March 22, 2009 at 6:35 pm | Permalink

    am ras bine. apoi am mai ras o data citand comentariile aka mica voastra conversatie.
    stefania e tare funny si pun pariu ca nici nu isi da seama :p

  13. Catalin
    Posted March 22, 2009 at 7:38 pm | Permalink

    @Bau.. sa nu-ti fie de deochi, sa nu-mi zici ca ai invatat ptr scoala. :)
    @Jo.. mie nu mi se pare funny, mi se pare tragic.
    Sau te refereai la celalalt sens pentru funny?

  14. Posted March 22, 2009 at 9:41 pm | Permalink

    Hysterical with a twang of slight dolphin fixation :D

  15. Catalin
    Posted March 22, 2009 at 9:43 pm | Permalink

    Glumele cu delfini se adresau lui vave. :)

  16. Posted March 22, 2009 at 10:29 pm | Permalink

    Da’ cine o fi şi vave asta de o tot pomeniţi? :-?

  17. Catalin
    Posted March 22, 2009 at 10:32 pm | Permalink

    Daca vave ar fi un comentariu, atunci tu ai fi. :P

  18. Posted March 22, 2009 at 10:50 pm | Permalink

    @Jo … it takes a lot of practice my friend… am avut un maestru bun :P
    @Catalin… :| … treci acolo in spatele blogului si repeta-ti rolul! /:)

  19. Posted March 22, 2009 at 11:14 pm | Permalink

    …si inca o ocazie de a vedea latura sensibila a lui Catalin trece pe langa noi… [sigh] descopera-ti latura feminina, let your emotions floooooow…

    or not, whatever :) )

  20. Catalin
    Posted March 22, 2009 at 11:21 pm | Permalink

    Ha ha ha.. chiar ca whatever.
    As mai face o data leapsa, tratand-o la modul serios. Dar.. c’mon, recunoaste ca varianta asta e mai interesanta. :)

  21. Posted March 22, 2009 at 11:28 pm | Permalink

    that was a looooooooooooong leapsa!
    but i’m done: http://xpriment.com/2009/03/what-a-way-to-end-the-day/

  22. Catalin
    Posted March 22, 2009 at 11:37 pm | Permalink

    hope you enjoyed it :)

  23. Posted March 23, 2009 at 11:16 am | Permalink

    Cât despre delfini, las’ că îţi fur eu armata de ninja şi atunci să te văd. :D

  24. Catalin
    Posted March 23, 2009 at 1:45 pm | Permalink

    Oooh, I’m scared. :)

  25. Posted March 23, 2009 at 4:11 pm | Permalink

    Ştiu. :D

  26. Posted March 23, 2009 at 7:40 pm | Permalink

    done and done – mi-a trimis-o si CopilAndra, asa ca e mai speciala :)
    http://luanar.wordpress.com/2009/03/22/daca-ar-fi-si-daca-s-ar-povesti/

  27. Posted March 23, 2009 at 8:39 pm | Permalink

    nu ma place lumea la tine pe blog :( (
    ai vazut cati au fugit dupa ce m-au vazut numai pe mine comentand?

    anyway… wish me luck.
    am aflat ca se va alege un reprezentant al proiectului pentru a purta discutii-negocieri pe domeniul administrativ cu conducerea firmei :D

    si… singurul concurent pe care il vad eu in acest moment, e un fecioara :P

  28. Posted March 23, 2009 at 8:54 pm | Permalink

    maine..maine …promit ca incerc :D

  29. Catalin
    Posted March 23, 2009 at 8:55 pm | Permalink

    You can do it, you can do it. :)

  30. Posted March 23, 2009 at 8:59 pm | Permalink

    referitor la sinestezia sentimentelor… tu nu te-ai simtit niciodata frustrat si iritat si singura varianta sa te linistesti ar fi fost sa plangi?

    eu ma chinui de vreo 3 zile si nu reusesc… azi m-am intalnit cu fostul la o patiserie si m-a facut sa ma simt penibil pentru ca ii era logodnica “oleac mai in spate” si abia m-a bagat in seama…

    chiar numai din situatii de genul asta devenim noi mai puternici? de ce nu ne motiveaza viata si in sens pozitiv? o lauda ceva… abia am reusit sa-mi inving timiditatea si acum vad ca toata lumea ma critica si ma judeca in loc sa ma aprecieze…

    ps… si tot nu pot sa plang. … si nici funny nu mai sunt…

  31. Catalin
    Posted March 23, 2009 at 9:01 pm | Permalink

    Nu, niciodata.
    I am not your therapist, wtf.

  32. Posted March 23, 2009 at 9:19 pm | Permalink

    @ Stefania: draga mamii, sincer ma intrigi… inteleg ca viata nu e tocmai roz, eu sunt cea mai in masura sa afirme asta, dar explica-mi si mie un lucru: leapsa lui Catalin, pe care de altfel am preluat-o si eu, tine de funny, de chestii lol, crazy, amuzante etc etc. De ce ti-ai ales tocmai la o astfel de postare sa comentezi in stilul asta?
    In plus, am incercat sa imi arunc o ocheada pe blogul tau. Am doua nelamuriri: de ce doresti sa fii contactata tocmai pe reinvented.ro unde, conform spuselor tale: “ai vazut cati au fugit dupa ce m-au vazut numai pe mine comentand?” Si de ce afirmi ca faci tot posibilul sa stai cat mai departe de mediul virtual, cd comentezi de mama focului?
    Sper ca nu am fost extremely bitch… nu asta era intentia mea! :)

  33. Catalin
    Posted March 23, 2009 at 9:26 pm | Permalink

    @Madelaine, nu incerca s-o intelegi pe Stefania.

  34. Posted March 23, 2009 at 9:33 pm | Permalink

    incerc doar sa inteleg de ce prefera sa fie contactata pe blogul tau… ce s-a intamplat cu al ei? sau va reinventati together si nu m-am prins io pana acum de schepsis? :P

  35. Catalin
    Posted March 23, 2009 at 9:35 pm | Permalink

    Nu. >:P
    Ma reinventez singur. Daca cineva se asociaza cu mine, n-are decat, asta nu inseamna ca eu tre’ sa aprob persoana respectiva.

  36. Jo
    Posted March 24, 2009 at 2:08 am | Permalink

    eu revin la a spune ca e funny Stefania. imi asum perspectiva complet subiectiva si cam neargumentata. imi aminteste de piesele lui Ionescu. si acolo e o impletire de tragic si comic, nu gasesti tragicul in forma lui pura.
    sau a murit cineva din cauza de Stefania?

  37. Catalin
    Posted March 24, 2009 at 10:04 am | Permalink

    Da, personalitatea ei. De mai multe ori.

  38. Posted March 24, 2009 at 7:55 pm | Permalink

    cum sa-si omoare cineva personalitatea? atunci ce mai ramane de …persoana respectiva?

  39. Stefania
    Posted July 31, 2012 at 11:04 am | Permalink

    doar cat sa scot de la naftalina postul asta, am murit de ras la comentarii, dupa atatia ani.

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